Ibikomere biterwa no gukurira mu muryango usenga cyane

Abantu barenga 90% muri Afurika yo munsi y’ubutayu bwa Sahara bavuga ko ukwemera kw’idini barimo ari ingenzi cyane mu buzima bwabo. Uku kwemera kw’amadini kwigaragaza mu buryo bwinshi: mu buzima bwa buri munsi, mu mibanire n’ubusabane na bagenzi babo, mu gushyingirwa n’imibanire y’abashakanye, ndetse no mu kurera abana. Abenshi muri twe, twakuze gusenga n’indi mihango y’idini bifite umwanya wihariye mu buzima bwacu. Nta n’ubwo ahubwo twabaga twemerewe kubisiba. Icyo ubwacyo ntabwo ari ikintu kibi. Amasengesho n’ukwemera kw’iyobokamana byagiye bifasha imiryango myinshi y’abanyafurika bikayinyuza mu bihe bikomeye bitandukanye. Byagiye bihuza abantu, bikabaha kubana no gufashanya, bikabigisha imyitwarire iboneye, bigaha na benshi igisobanuro shingiro cy’ubuzima batarabona ahandi.

Ariko se ibi bivuze ko nta kibazo gishobora kuba mu rugo rwuje ukwemera kandi rwubakiye ku isengesho? Oya. Kandi kubyirengagiza ntibihindura ukuri.

Iyi nkuru ntabwo igamije kugira ukwemera cyangwa idini runaka itera amabuye. Nta n’ubwo igamije kurwanya ababyeyi bahitamo kurera abana babo mu buryo bushingiye ku kwemera kwabo mbere y’ibindi byose. Ibyo tugiye kuvuga bigaragara mu madini atandukanye: mu ngo z’abakristu, iz’abayisilamu, n’ahandi. Ikibazo si uko ukwemera nta mwanya gufite mu muryango. Kurawufite kandi w’ingenzi. Ahubwo ikibazo ni uko rimwe kurera bisimbuzwa uko kwemera, kandi ntitunabimenye.

Ababyeyi benshi basenga cyane babonye ukuboko kw’Imana mu buzima bwabo, yabakoreye ibitangaza barabyibonera n’amaso yabo. Ukwemera kwabo ntabwo ari uburyarya, ni ukuri ndakuka kuri bo. Kubera uko kwemera kwabo gukomeye, abenshi bavugira mu mutima bati: Imana niyo izarera aba bana. Bagaburira abana babo, bakabambika, bakabavuza, bakanabashyira mu ishuri. Basengera abana babo ubudasiba. Ubundi, ibindi bakabiharira Imana, bati “Harera Imana”. Ariko ibi bigira ingaruka ku mwana. Umwana abona umubyeyi bahurira mu nzu imwe ariko badafitanye umubano. Umwana wawe akenera ko umuba hafi mu buryo bw’amarangamutima, ntakenera gusa ibyo kurya no kwambara, n’amasengesho. Hari igihe aba akeneye ko umuba hafi nk’umubyeyi umukunda, cyangwa nk’umujyanama yizeye wamutanze kubona izuba umufasha gusobanukirwa ibyo ari guhura nabyo mu buzima. Ntabwo buri gihe ariko aba akeneye ko umubera umujyanama mu by’umwuka.

Undi mutego ababyeyi basenga cyane bakunze kugwamo ni ukubona buri myitwarire y’umwana, buri mbogamizi ahura nazo, na buri cyiciro cy’imikurire agezemo mu ndorerwamo z’iyobokamana. Ibi bituma cyane cyane umubyeyi atabona imyitwarire y’umwana nk’ikintu gisanzwe kijyanye no kuba nyine ari umwana, kuko imyitwarire yose umwana agaragaje ntimunyure ahita ayifata nk’ikibazo gikomeye aho kuba icyiciro umwana ari kunyuramo mu mikurire ye.

Ingero abenshi murazizi: ngo umwana w’imyaka ibiri ari gukubagana cyane ntiyumva — ubanza ari amadayimoni yamuteye. Ngaho ngo umwana w’umwangavu ntagishaka kubahiriza amategeko yo mu rugo — noneho sinzi amadayimoni yamuteye! Aha niho umubano hagati y’umubyeyi n’umwana ukunze kwangirikira. Umwana yumva ababyeyi be batamwumva ahubwo bamuciriyeho iteka kandi ari bo muryango we, aho yagombye kwisanga. Igitangaje ni uko ibintu nk’ibi ari byo bikunze gutuma umwana yumva yanze gusenga cyangwa yanze idini ababyeyi baba bamuhatira kwibonamo.

Ndi umukristu. Nzi neza akamaro k’isengesho. Ariko kandi ndi umuntu, nzi neza ko ibibazo byose atari ibibazo by’umwuka. Ibibazo bimwe na bimwe biba ari ibibazo bisanzwe by’ubuzima, bisaba ko tugira uruhare rwacu mu kubikemura aho gusaba Imana ngo ibidukemurire. Ibi ntabwo ari uguhinyuza ukwemera, ni ukumva ko Imana yaturemeye kugira uruhare mu buzima bwacu.

Niba umwana wawe yishatsemo imbaraga bimugoye akakubwira ko afite ingorane, ko yumva aremerewe, kandi ubuzima buri kumugora, cyangwa ko afite agahinda gakabije, ukamubwira ngo nagende asenge, ntacyo uba umufashije. Arabizi ko agomba gusenga, wabimutoje kuva akiri muto. Aje akugana kugira ngo umutege amatwi, kugira ngo yumve ko atari wenyine, kugira ngo umusangize ibyo wanyuzemo byakugoye, yumve ko ibyo ari guhura nabyo ari ibintu bisanzwe, umutere imbaraga zo guhangana nabyo.

Niba umwana wawe akubwiye ibiri kumugora bimukomereye, ukamusubiza ngo genda wiyirize kandi usenge cyane, ibyo ntabwo bimuhumuriza. Yumva ko ibimugoye ntacyo bikubwiye. Icyo bimubwira ni uko, wowe, umubyeyi we akunda cyane kandi yizera, udashobora gusobanukirwa ibihe bikomeye ari kunyuramo. Icyo gikomere ntabwo amasengesho yonyine azakivura.

Uyu mutego abakunze kuwugwamo ni ababyeyi baba bafite imyanya ikomeye mu madini. Isura nziza baba bafite muri sosiyete ni ingenzi cyane kuri bo. Akenshi abana babo nibo bikorera umutwaro w’iyo sura nziza.

Ibi biba mu buryo bwinshi: ibiganiro abana batemerewe kuzana mu rugo, ibibazo batemerewe kubana ababyeyi babo n’iyo babigiraho amatsiko kuko ‘bidakwiriye’; imikino n’imyidagaduro batemerewe kuko byahesha umuryango wabo isura mbi; amarangamutima batagomba kugaragaza, n’ibindi. Ariko igikomeye cyane kikaba iyo umwana abonye umubyeyi we mu isura itandukanye cyane n’iyo agaragaza mu ruhame. Iyo ibi bibaye, bitera umwana urujijo rukomeye ku bijyanye n’ukwemera, indangagaciro, no gutandukanya ikibi n’icyiza. Uru rujijo ruramukurikirana akenshi rukazigaragaza habaho ishyano ryanduza ya sura nziza yasigasiwe cyane. Kubera ko mu by’ukuri: Nta mwiza ubaho, keretse Imana yonyine (Mariko 10:18).

Abana bigira mu byo babona cyane kurusha ibyo babwirwa n’amabwiriza bahabwa. Niba koko ukwemera kwawe guhamye kandi ukaba usenga nta buryarya, umwana wawe azabibona, azabona agaciro bifite mu buzima bwawe. Azabona imbaraga ukura mu isengesho, azibonere mu rukundo umwereka. Batoze mu kwemera kwawe bakiri bato, maze uko bagenda bakura, ugende ubaha umwanya n’ubwisanzure. Berere imbuto z’umwuka ariko kandi bakubone nk’umubyeyi bisangaho kandi ubatega amatwi akabumva nk’umuntu. Kandi ubagaragarize mu bikorwa, ko urukundo ubafitiye rudakama mu gihe bahisemo kutagendera mu kwemera kwawe. Abana baba bagifite byinshi bari kwiga mu buzima, kuba bagira ibyo babaza cyangwa bagerageza guhinyuza, ni ibisanzwe kandi intambwe y’ingenzi mu mikurire yabo. Bahe umwanya wo kuba abana. Bahe umwanya wo gukura.